New Year, New WE
Week 2
Welcome back for week 2 of goal setting!! Last week we reviewed setting mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical goals. Some of the suggestions, like saying no more often, struck out especially to me. As a past people pleaser, I often find myself adding more unto my plate than I can handle and feeling bad about saying no. After reading through Emotional Confidence by The Harvard Business Review Press and The Myth of Normal by Dr. Gabor Mate and Daniel Mate, it turns out I am not the only one! Saying "no" more often is one I am adding to my 2024 goal list.
How do we get the most out of our goals?
Goal setting can be fun for some and cause anxiety for others. There are a few great references and advice to how we can set ourselves up for success in the New Year.
The reason. Find this! Yes, go as deep as the reason to live. Finding our own specific visions for how we would like to see ourselves in a few months or even decades down the line is important on deciding what we should be doing and should not be doing.
Get specific. Find a goal and write down the subcomponents that are required to accomplish that goal. Break them down into monthly, weekly, and daily increments.
Challenge. Goals need to be putting us outside our comfort zone, even if it is just an inch, get outside that circle.
Alter some of the goals that we may currently have already implemented and add to them instead of starting something new.
Accept failure and observe wins. It is important to know that we will fail or fall short. We are human, that is what we do. Take note of the failure, honestly determine the root of the failure, decide on how to recognize the warning signs in the future, analyze how the situation should have gone, and move forward. 1 mistake does not mean throw away the goal. Same is true with a win. They are just as important, but I would argue even more important to "watch out" for. The Ego is a part of us and breeds in comfortability and through compliments. A win should be acknowledged on what went correct in the situation, determine the steps that went right for the positive outcome, analyze how to repeat the outcome, and move forward. Celebrating wins too long creates complacently. Pretty sure most "strong" armies and civilizations in history have been attacked during celebratory times and holidays.
On that note, time for more goal categories :)
Goal Categories:
Environmental: At the end of my of my Substacks you may have seen a section devoted to our impact on the environment for the various topics. As humans we have made our way around the world exploiting every part of the living and non-living for technological advances, scientific discoveries, revenue goals, religion, and many other reasons. The debate is still up for whether the ends do justify the means. We can equip ourselves with knowledgeable considerations to our impacts based on our daily decisions. Here are some steps.
Reduce: The first step is check in with ourselves on evaluating the items we are purchasing and if they are actually needed. Before purchasing go down the list of needs (maybe from Maslow) and determine which of the needs this purchase fulfills. Maybe the new shirt would fulfill the social and esteem needs? Of course, physical needs are met as well since shirts are still required in most locations but do, we already have many more that fulfill this need? Next, go down the chain of command where this shirt came from. Maybe from the very plowing of the fields to help grown the cotton plant. Are the bugs and plants effected? What about the soil and water from the sprays? What happens when the cotton arrives at the factory? Is it treated again, maybe with bleach? Are the workers paid fairly and working in acceptable conditions? When the cotton is spun into threads will it be dyed with colors that will not only fill our eyes with excitement but also the waterways that will forever destroy the hope for life? And how could we forget the logistics? Driving from the fields to the factory, factory to maybe another factory, to a distribution center, to shipping, on a plane/waterway/truck, to another truck, to probably another distribution center, to the store or maybe to us finally. This is just for the “cleaner” option. oil derived materials have a much different story. And what happens when we return those items? Almost all for nothing. Thank goodness we got the right logo on the shirt.
Reuse: I realized I was best at this when I had the least amount of money. As we make money (or due to the availability and hysteria of overconsumption during our time), we typically have a mindset "I will just replace it". I have only heard stories from Baby Boomers (1946-1964) and Gen Xers (1965-1980) how they used to fix appliances, automobiles, clothes, stuff around the house, and just about anything before resulting in purchasing a new product. At the same time, corporations got bigger and bigger, went public, and the spotlight was now on revenue targets to prove to investors that the company is actually doing something. Marketing and media increased, sales teams pushed harder, and at some point, everything got, cheaper. Bags of chips with more air, clothes that fall apart during the first wear, and people replacing themselves with things. Check out the history of Nylon and how this product replaced silk, became strong enough to use during war and on women's legs to ripping a hole from a simple snag. all for what? Well, they needed more sales, so the product got cheaper for consumers to replace sooner. Most fashion styles come back after a few years (in a free market) anyway so just store the clothes until they are back. Even easier? Take the Zukerberg approach and reduce decisions by keeping wardrobes as simple as possible.
I am shocked at how many other reusable options we have. There are a few good options here, but I challenge you to analyze before throwing anything away, just consider for a second if the item can be reused. Plastic containers from yogurts can be used as bath time toys for kids, storage containers, or even pots for new plants. Uneaten foods can go to a compost bin. Old shirts and pants can become towels for cleaning. Shoeboxes for storing small items.
Repair: Growing up, my best friend was my grandma. She taught all of us to sew at a very young age and we had sewing machines by about 8 or 9. I believe sewing is one of the most important skills we can learn. To have the ability to fix a hole in a sock, a button on a suit before an interview, or even a tear in our skin. There are many other items around the house we can fix too. Before throwing an item out, ask what can I do to make this whole again? Relationships are the same.
Career: Many of us have to make money ourselves but back to Machiavelli's words. 40 hours is the full-time schedule for most in America, some work more, some less. The pay varies widely and the gap is widening. But the focus here is our time. The opportunity costs of making the dollar.
Find the purpose of the specific career we are in. Is it worth the time? The money? How do we feel at the end of the day? More importantly, what do we feel when we wake up?
Sit for a few moments and map out where you expect your career to go. What are the steps? What is the goal? Are we working for money? For freedom? For pleasure?
Decide if the current career is worth it. How are we impacting the people closest to us because of our jobs?
Financial: This one is rough for many people. We seem to be programed for more, more, and more of anything and everything these days. We cannot handle more if we cannot handle what we already have.
Figure out the basic survival amount in $$. No, do not include the bi-weekly iced coffee in this budget. What is our minimum shelter, grocery (check out “Grocery Stalking” on how to reduce costs), transportation, water, and healthcare. Are there any debts we currently owe? Add that in too.
Next, determine where you are in life. Currently struggling? Comfortable? New business owner? New homeowner? Growing family? This will help determine any stressor points and what stage of life we can plan for.
Are we saving for anything? A repair? A house?
Go through the list again in a., are there any ways we can reduce costs? For example, if we are saving for a house, maybe moving to a cheaper place to rent will allow hundreds of dollars in monthly savings and equal 10K by the end of the year.
Based on our calculations for reducing costs, how much can we put away for savings or investing? Just $20 a month is still $240 a year! Set up automatic payments to send money to a savings account with each paycheck.
Finally, decide the best way to keep track. For some spreadsheets are our best friends, for others a pen and paper may work better, and now we have so many apps and sites that can help with budgeting. Choose one that will not sell your information and stay consistent. Some apps will even pause transactions if we go over our budget amount.
For others, switching back to cash is a big help. This is what I did in college. I had a certain amount I had each week for "play money". Once it was out, it was out. Envelopes with cash can be split for a variety of bills, personal "play money", or even for allowance for kids.
Find another source of income. Maybe that is side jobs, dog walking, babysitting, repairing items, building furniture, investing, a new business. There are apps and options.
Passions/hobbies/leisure: What we do outside of hard work is extremely important, especially for children! The books The Importance of Being Little by Erika Christakis and Free-Range Kids by Lenore Skenazy all explain the need for children to play for the first few (arguably 7) years of life. NOT workbooks or sitting in a classroom. Students who had the ability to play when they were children for extended periods of time (with an adult and independently) performed better than children who had to start school as soon as they walk. Remember, Einstein did not have flashcards and these “Montessori schools” that claim to outperform. The same is true with adults. Having other hobbies that we are involved in helps us solve problems in other areas of our lives. We are more creative, happier, and even physically better by doing activities we enjoy. This is not really a big surprise. Who does not want to do what they want?
Answer a few of these questions to help get started on some hobbies.
Choose something that is not stressful but allows us to work on personal goals and passions.
Now, the goal suggestions for the different categories:
Environmental:
Paper straws won't save the turtles or us. Eliminate plastic. Why? Read part 1 and 2 of “Crinkle”.
Begin adding a step between "buy now". Maybe it is a mental check where we acknowledge the front to end of this product and if it is really worth the impact. We know that adding steps to purchasing deters us from making purchases so do the opposite. Hide the credit card or do not save it on file.
Set a clothing purchase goal! In 2023 my goal was to buy 0 new clothes. That meant only "new" clothes from family or friends or from thrift stores.
Check out "But What Will I Wear" and set a goal to remove synthetics entirely from our clothing to reduce water contamination, harmful skin effects, and fossil fuel use.
Stop caring about logos. The reality is most of these "name brands" we fight over are made in the same factories, with the same materials, at the same cost. Just different marketing tactics. To impress who?
Are there items in our house we can be reusing for a different purpose? Go over the budget from the financial section and start getting creative! It is amazing how much we can save by just reusing some items.
For example, Kombucha comes in glass bottles, I reuse those for juices, soups, and as water bottles. Now I do not have to buy a new water bottle every time I leave it somewhere. Cost savings of at least $50 a year. Instead of new towels for cleaning the kitchen or even paper towels, use old shirts. Another $50-100 in savings. Going to buy new bath toys for kids? Instead, let them get creative with old yogurt containers. Boxes and sticks are still kids’ favorite toys. Why? Because the answer is not already presented to them. They have to use creativity to turn a stick into a wand to cast spells or to draw a picture in the mud. Minimalist toys do not need to be bought. Use shoe or other boxes for storage! I may be the only one shocked at seeing a $20 price tag for some boxes made of polyester when I could use wrapping paper or fabric to wrap my own boxes for cube shelves. Another $120 ($20 boxes * average 6 cube holes) in savings! If you are counting, we are at $250 by just reusing a few household items.
Get a toolbox. Yes ladies, you too. Luckily my dad taught us the basic tools and how we can use them so when I moved on my own, that box came with me (and no it was not pink but get pink one, it is cute). At this point YouTube can really teach any skill we are unfamiliar with FOR FREE.
Learn to sew. This is an essential life skill and can be very easy and cheap to get started. Even dollar stores have basic sewing kits.
Learn skills on how to repair or build items. In college one of my part time jobs was to literally go to someone's house and build some Ikea kit they had bought. Not only will this help around the house but another option to add revenue to our lives.
Do a cost benefit analysis before deciding to buy vs repair. Do we just need some tape or hammer and nails?
Career:
Decide your path. Where do you want to be in 3 months, 6 months? A year? 10 years? Maybe you do not know. But first try sitting down and determining for as long as it takes before dismissing this step. Without direction, where are we going?
Want that promotion? Have you done the work to get it? Be specific with bosses or managers on your direction and brainstorm on how you can get there.
Make it a goal to start that business you have been debating about starting.
Work on those soft skills. If there is one action, I have learned no matter what job I have been at, kindness, politeness, and geniuses will carry us further than hard skills at times. Make friends NOT "connections" or "networks". Take courses online, read books, and really focus on the inner self to make these improvements. My goal wherever I am is to make friends. From there, the rest follows.
Be the export in a subject. Mark Cuban's book How to Win at the Sport of Business: If I can Do it You Can Do it, was all about how he was the only one who read these massive books about a software he was selling. He became extremely successful because he put in the extra work when everyone else chose laziness. Make it a goal to learn a new skill through LinkedIn or Google's free courses that relates to your career goals.
Financial:
Make it a goal to get out of debt. Negotiate on the lowest payments with lowest amount of interest or even options for paying in full. Pay highest interest bearing dept first.
Make it a goal to track debits and credits each month.
Set up a monthly (or per check) savings goal.
If you need a system that denies card, use if overspending, get that software.
Have a retirement goal or plan. Robinhood offers a Retirment account option if your job does not have one or if you would like another option.
Learn to invest and wisely. This is a gamble with the markets so choose wisely or opt out.
Make it a goal to never spend what you do not have (unless emergency). Prevent this by have a good savings and being mindful of purchases.
Reminder to repair items to increase savings goals. Relationship repairs are often cheaper than "new" too.
Passion/hobbies/leisure:
If you do not already have one, make it a goal to find a hobby this year!
Get social with your hobby goal. Maybe the goal is to read 4 books this year. Get a friend or two to join you in reading the same book. Maybe everyone gets together each month too. Maybe at someone's house where each person brings a snack. Now we have accomplished our hobby, emotional, mental, relationship, and even financial goals by opting for home cooked meals.
If you already have a hobby and have the time for it, find a new one! Take a new archery or cooking class. Learn to hunt, or ice skate, or fly a drone. Find a new city to explore! Need ideas? See what your friends are doing and ask if you can join!
Hope these suggestions can be a few items we can add to our 2024 goal list! Next week will be our final post of 2023 :)
Thank you for reading!
"Destiny is Mine"
Have you tried any of these goals before? Let me know!
*Reminder* I am not a doctor. This is not medical advice. Always consult your pediatrician, doctor, or nutritionist for individual specific goals as well as doing your own research.